I'm Back!!! (A semi - long update!)

Sweet Decadence

Bouncin Around Like a Bunneh
Joined
Jan 13, 2013
Messages
122
Update - 5/27 -

Hey Everyone! Well its been interesting with everything.

First off. Skip's mother is coming out of this cancer looking at a 75% chance at remission. Shes going for chemo in 2 weeks. But she was diagnosed with food controlled diabetes, where she has to really watch what she eats and it was recommended that she lose a lot of weight.

I had posted a while ago that Skip's ex wife having a "meltdown" gave us both boys for the entire summer because it was "safe" at her apartment anymore. She basically would go cause drama with a downstairs neighbor who would retaliate. Eventually a restraining order was given to the woman downstairs against her, She lost her keys and claims that the woman downstairs had stolen them. So she has to replace the ignition and locks on her car. Plus replace the lock to her apartment which should had been done within days after claiming her keys had been stolen. Her father gave her the money to replace both the ignition and locks on the apartment this weekend. EVEN though he is the manager of her apartment complex. Makes sense? Nope. Now that the apartment has been notified they've changed the locks. She wasn't going to tell us, she let it slip. From what I've noticed her plan was to leave the kids with us all summer, and still claim the child support which is pulled from Skip's paycheck and the welfare/cash aide and use it on herself and not the children. Essentially committing welfare fraud. I waved the red flag. Then her story changed to a few weeks, then she would be back to avoiding the subject.

She then claimed she might have cancer when confronted with taking her to the doctors she avoided it. But what really sent me over the edge is, this past Friday Skip had to get a tooth pulled, and she was driving him because they weren't sure what kind of drug they were going to use. She told Skip she would be there at 2pm.. she showed up at noon. Skip had forgotten to lock the front door, she didn't bother knocking, there is evidence she went through some of our stuff on the desk, but nothing missing. Skip and I were fast asleep in our bed, he still works graves and I usually am passed out until noon. I've been sleeping a lot lately. She claims she knocked on our bedroom door. Which is a lie because I am a light sleeper because of the boys knocking on our door, she came right in. She had Skips expensive phone and was on the phone with the cops about her neighbor and asked Skip what his number was THAT is what woke us up. I'm still livid about it. I told him I would be calling the cops personally next time.

So after that intrusion of a lifetime, I finally told Skip he needed to sit down with her and find out what was going on or I was going to be hitting up the welfare office and notifying the police over her drug habits were causing child endangerment because of our work schedules she would have to watch the children for a night. This past weekend after picking them up he discovered she used the last of her money to buy pot and got high with the guy of the week with the children fast asleep. After I him told me this I told him I can get a lawyer on a moments notice. I would have that child custody agreement changed and we would be taking them full time, since that's what she was showing us. This woman claims to a back injury she cant work, according to Skip it wasn't serious, she pulled a muscle and used it as a easy way out of work. She got addicted to pain medications and here we are. Skip spoke to her and she has changed her tune. We are going back to our "old" schedule according to her. Shes actually called us up to discipline the kids because they don't view her as a parental figure, just a baby sitter. They've started to call me mom and they ignore her half the time if I'm in the room. She really saw it recently and she didn't like it. Skip had to tell her, they viewed her that way because her lack of involvement. So that means Summer vacation is going to be fun.

At work we've lost a lead, but gained one that's awesome. And with everything being shifted hopefully soon we'll have a new part timer :)




Wow! The year is flying by!!! I cant believe it almost May! 0 My life has finally settled down from the last few months. But they've been the best I've had in years!


Last year was ending horribly, it started off with my great grandmother passing in Sept. My sister being temp. disowned by my mother and brother, when she moved her online boyfriend in with her after seeing him maybe twice. A week after out grandmother passed away. My mother is a very controlling person and claimed that her doing that she (my sister) should of talked to her and she would of told her it was a bad idea. It was a life altering decision, that affected her(my mom).... I was the only one on my sister's side, even our younger brother turned on us once he saw how angry our mother got. Then yelled a string of disrespectful words towards me when she got mad at him too because he had done something similar in the past and he was trying to play innocent.

So anyways, My sister hadn't lived with us for almost 5 years, she pays her own bills, etc. How she found out about said boyfriend sucked. Through facebook when he posted pics of them together on my sister's wall. I told my sister bad idea, and that I supported her decision, its her life. She cant have our mother even if her intentions are good, rule her life like she used to.

Then after all that my ex un-expectantly passing away in Nov. He was a mentally abusive man, he was extremely insecure with himself and basically brainwashed me, making me believe I was there to support him in what he wanted and if he didn't like what I did, I had to stop it. He would often try to sell my collections for money. He hated my animals. Towards our relationship I finally woke up and started to break it off, when I realized he was just using me. Finally ending it Sept. '10. I stayed in contact with a sister by choice of his who had been kind to me. She notified me. I took it hard, because it awoken a mixture of feelings, regret, hatred, even sadness. But I accepted that he was gone and I was truly free of him, as sad as that sounds. He would occasionally attempt to contact me for money. I ignored him.

In dec, is when everything changed. I met my current boyfriend. My Skip. 0
I was one of his regulars up until May of last year because of work, he works at a local gas station. Last year his wife left him and he got a divorce and was forced to move back in with his parents. A very sweet and caring man with two small boys I get to play momma to now, since their mother is such a screw up. She rarely ever wants them with her, she pawns them off.

I made sure to tell my mother I had been asked out and she approved of him. Which is amazing because shes the president of the I hate men club. She raised us girls not to trust men. After a few weeks he saw how "held" back I was. Like I mentioned earlier my mother is very controlling, borderline about the same level as my ex. I was to go to work, and stay home. Having friends is ok, but don't get close because if I spent more time with them than her, she'd call them up scream at them saying they were using me and to leave me alone because I wasn't allowed to hang out with them anymore. 0 I put up with it. She would borderline treat me like I was stupid. I was never allowed to go anywhere alone, it got to the point she would refused to allow me to learn how to drive. My coworkers were horrified when she came in and told them off for putting ideas in my head about driving. I was too "immature".. I was 24. Now 25 years old.

Wellll She never expected someone to come in and go this isn't healthy. He noticed how fearful I would get and he would baby me and reassure me I was ok. He began taking me home with him. By Valentines I was semi moved in. I saw my mother maybe a few days a week. She had to learn how to deal with me being gone. She did verbally attack a few times. She would call me up and yell at me and accuse me of abusing my animals, because she would claim I didn't water them, and I had to come home asap. Otherwise I would have to end my relationship, because it was obvious he was too "controlling". The first time I was maybe I forgot, then found out they all had water. Then we figured out quickly, she was the controlling one....

Her jealousy got real noticeable because I mentioned Skip wanted to get a pair of rabbits before he moved out and one of my friends who she hates was taking me. Like everyone else she was using "us" and was a liar. Yea no. -_- Even after I told her she wouldn't have to tend them at all she said no, that they would be leaving by the end of the month, still no. I was for reals what is your deal? I flat out said do you want me to be even a little happy? she point blank said no.

Well I got the rabbits, she didn't know they were there for about 2 weeks. Before anyone goes shes your mom, its her house, her rules. Yea about that... it's not her house. It my brother's. And I got my brother's permission to have them there for a few weeks. All she pays is the electric bill and the cable bill. My tribe pays for the rest. Yes we "live" on a reservation, she's considered an outsider. If one of us kids live there, shes allowed to stay there. I told her the rabbits would be gone by the end of the month. She didn't figure I would be too.

I have my part time job, and extra money from my tribe from our business (a casino, I work there too, its not fun) well we were able to move much to his mother's horror. She was using him a extra paycheck to live in a expensive house.

We now live in a beautiful 2 bedroom apartment, with 2 bathrooms and is 966 sq feet :) We have the 3 bunnies (maintance guy gave us one), our 2 kittens and 2 fish. I'm all good on the pets xP We pay our own bills and I've never been happier.

But during the hecticness of this life I've missed out on a lot of MLP. My boyfriend is extremely accepting of my hobbies and of my collections. He is even willing to watch MLP with me :D
 
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Awe man, the lot of that sounds like a massive headache~

I think for most of everyone, the only real way to keep peace with their parents by a certain age, is to move away.

Glad to hear there was a light at the end of the tunnel, that things are looking up, and that you've surrounded yourself with people that support what you love.
 
Welcome back! Sounds like you've been through quite a lot the past year. Hopefully this year will bring you some peace and stability. Having your own place is a great step towards that. Living by pthers' rules is seldom a happy thing.

You'll have to show us some pics of your cute pets! I've always been particularly fond of rabbits myself (who knew, right? :winkpony:)!
 
So far it's been awesome! We have a one year lease on our apartment.

His mother is now having issues with him not being there, my moms gotten over it for the most part. Whenever I see his mom she makes rude comments towards him, calling him fat or me ugly. She was using him as a income know full well he'd be leaving. Before we moved out she informed us we owed her $2000 o_O then she couldn't wait for us to leave when we were moving his stuff even to the point she thought it was funny to be throwing things at me. Then she went Well out of the kindness of my heart, I'll let you borrow a pot, 2 forks, but they have to be returned asap. She told us we could take the ramen, that I had bought. And a can of corn and tuna. Then one of his sisters called to ask for money. -_-

I've been dealing with his ex wife ok, shes done some things that are way not cool. We have a feeling shes going to be giving us custody soon, since she cant party hardy with kids. Or get high whenever she wants. The woman is 31 -_- she clearly said yesterday that she was jealous of my boyfriend, that everything is going right for him while everything around her is crumbling. She was expecting him to wait for her while she did her thing and for her to use him. She tried that and I put it to a stop. He's better than that. I allow him to go do his stuff like Dungeon and Dragons or Vampire Masquerade, I let him have mason jars instead of normal cups. She claimed it was obvious who had bought them and was offended by them for being lowclass, and asked me if she could throw them away. I was DUDE I bought those! Put my stuff down. XD

Recently his phone became very temperamental, to the point I was dude we're getting you a new phone. He was I don't have the money for a new phone... I dragged him to Tmobile and used their Jump plan, and he got a Samsung S5 which is VERY fancy! He had no problems paying the sales tax for it. He loves it. He's always had the sucky phones and not actual reliable phones. Now its better than mine. lol So I often steal it to take pictures of him sleeping with a kitten on his face <3
 
Sheesh! That sounds like a year from ****:sadpony: I didn't know you were gone as I'm new here, but welcomeback and nice to meet you:smilepony: I'm so glad you found happiness after all that, I love it when people are happy an find a compatable partner. So I'm wishing you all the luck with your new life, may it be long and prosperous:satisfied:
 
Hi there, and welcome back! :LOL:

It's sad when parents think they own their kids and when partners think they can change and control the other person... I'm happy that you guys escaped from their manipulation, and that you found each other. In a relationship, it's important to let the other person have their interests and to be supportive of them, and you seem to be doing exactly that, which is awesome. ^^ It's even better if you can share your interests with each other. It's great that he's watching MLP with you (I've got my boyfriend to do the same, and I think he enjoys it despite the halfhearted protests). D&D and VtM are fantastic, so perhaps you should go with him one day and just observe, even if it's just to see what it's about.

I love cats, and I've wanted bunnies for a few years now... but I don't have a garden for them, as I live in a flat, so I'd have to bunny-proof everything... and I also don't know how well this pair of hyperactive two-year-old kitties will take to a bunny...
 
Hi there, and welcome back! :LOL:

It's sad when parents think they own their kids and when partners think they can change and control the other person... I'm happy that you guys escaped from their manipulation, and that you found each other. In a relationship, it's important to let the other person have their interests and to be supportive of them, and you seem to be doing exactly that, which is awesome. ^^ It's even better if you can share your interests with each other. It's great that he's watching MLP with you (I've got my boyfriend to do the same, and I think he enjoys it despite the halfhearted protests). D&D and VtM are fantastic, so perhaps you should go with him one day and just observe, even if it's just to see what it's about.

I love cats, and I've wanted bunnies for a few years now... but I don't have a garden for them, as I live in a flat, so I'd have to bunny-proof everything... and I also don't know how well this pair of hyperactive two-year-old kitties will take to a bunny...
Depending on the breed temperament on the bunny, sometimes they do amazingly. We raised litters with my 8 year old Ellie, a Holland lop that I adored, she sadly passed away about 2 years ago. But I always had rabbits so all of our future kittens were raised with rabbits, even my current duo Evy and Dice.

He tried to introduce me into VtM and totally lost me, but the other person who was playing with him, made me feel stupid. He said not to worry about it, he would take me to an actual game with more than one person. I've got a issue where I cant always say what I want to say, I sound like a bumbling idiot sometimes but if I write it out it comes out right. And skip is reverse, he has problems writing but loves to talk. Ying and Yang we are. :)
 
We've hit a wall... and its not a good one.

Yesterday around noon, we were informed by Skip's ex-wife who volunteered to take his mother to the doctors that something's wrong. Skip's mom's cancer is back, and its everywhere. Here we go again. :frown: There's a possibility she's stage 3-4... because she's been avoiding the doctors for so long for her hernia.

I lost my grandfather on my mom's to kidney cancer almost 12 years ago, and my grandfather on my dad's side 4 years ago. Both of them my favorites. The only physical picture I have of anyone in my family is my father's father, since I didn't have any pictures of my mother's father. It was a thing I said moving in is I would always have roses in our house/apt, Skip didn't believe me. I got roses right away. On a special table in my living room, I kinda made a little shrine... With candles and roses.

Sadly I know what to expect in a way when its the later stages. And I know its not good.
 
So far it's been awesome! We have a one year lease on our apartment.

His mother is now having issues with him not being there, my moms gotten over it for the most part. Whenever I see his mom she makes rude comments towards him, calling him fat or me ugly. She was using him as a income know full well he'd be leaving. Before we moved out she informed us we owed her $2000 o_O then she couldn't wait for us to leave when we were moving his stuff even to the point she thought it was funny to be throwing things at me. Then she went Well out of the kindness of my heart, I'll let you borrow a pot, 2 forks, but they have to be returned asap. She told us we could take the ramen, that I had bought. And a can of corn and tuna. Then one of his sisters called to ask for money. -_-

I've been dealing with his ex wife ok, shes done some things that are way not cool. We have a feeling shes going to be giving us custody soon, since she cant party hardy with kids. Or get high whenever she wants. The woman is 31 -_- she clearly said yesterday that she was jealous of my boyfriend, that everything is going right for him while everything around her is crumbling. She was expecting him to wait for her while she did her thing and for her to use him. She tried that and I put it to a stop. He's better than that. I allow him to go do his stuff like Dungeon and Dragons or Vampire Masquerade, I let him have mason jars instead of normal cups. She claimed it was obvious who had bought them and was offended by them for being lowclass, and asked me if she could throw them away. I was DUDE I bought those! Put my stuff down. XD

Recently his phone became very temperamental, to the point I was dude we're getting you a new phone. He was I don't have the money for a new phone... I dragged him to Tmobile and used their Jump plan, and he got a Samsung S5 which is VERY fancy! He had no problems paying the sales tax for it. He loves it. He's always had the sucky phones and not actual reliable phones. Now its better than mine. lol So I often steal it to take pictures of him sleeping with a kitten on his face <3

x____x *does a healthy empathetic primal scream*

I've been screaming a lot... sometimes it's for a reason, some times, for nothing at all~

I think that deserved a scream. The situation with the false claims of owed money and whatnot sounds like how we parted ways with our former land lady.... she gave us a 90 day notice to move out because she wanted to live in our place, so we found a new place within 30 days then she got offended that we didn't give her a 30 day notice. Then was impatient about us getting out, stated there would be a "final bill" (which there never was) then was friendly again once we turned in the keys~

As for the ex, holy cow. I've dealt with some doozies, but too busy partying to take care of her kids... that's just... wow. Priorities man, priorities~ kids are worth prioritizing~
 
x____x *does a healthy empathetic primal scream*

I've been screaming a lot... sometimes it's for a reason, some times, for nothing at all~

I think that deserved a scream. The situation with the false claims of owed money and whatnot sounds like how we parted ways with our former land lady.... she gave us a 90 day notice to move out because she wanted to live in our place, so we found a new place within 30 days then she got offended that we didn't give her a 30 day notice. Then was impatient about us getting out, stated there would be a "final bill" (which there never was) then was friendly again once we turned in the keys~

As for the ex, holy cow. I've dealt with some doozies, but too busy partying to take care of her kids... that's just... wow. Priorities man, priorities~ kids are worth prioritizing~

Yea now shes "claiming" shes sick. She not. She can go places when we have the kids but when she has them and for example. My boyfriend had a kidney infection and kidney stones, but she was unreachable. And the person who knew where she was wouldn't tell us. We got her ex boyfriend to take Skip to the hospital and I stayed home with the kids, the entire 9 hours he was gone. She had the audacity to tell Skip he had to keep the boys, and she wouldn't come get them because she wasn't home, then it was she was "busy". Her guy of the week wouldn't get out of her house -_-

We needed a break from the boys as much as we love them. Skip really needed it, he was still recovering. The eldest has ADHD and the youngest is acting like he might have it too somedays. The eldest is on meds, but they have to be upped again. I've seen him off his meds, and he cant control himself. Plus the youngest with sick with a stomach bug that was contagious to kids. Joys and Easter weekend too.

So we had given her the youngest to take him to the doctor, because he couldn't keep anything down. She fought us against taking him to the doctors saying we could handle it. We finally got her to take him to the ER, because she refuses to give us their medical information. He was prescribed meds, she NEVER filled it because "he was feeling better". To allow Skip to get some sleep, he had dropped off the eldest with her too. She didn't have the boys at least 12 hours. She called us at 7:00 in the evening, going I think I got what Johnny has... which is a stomach bug that affects only children. -_- had my boyfriend come get the kids. The instant he's back with us he's back to the way he was. My boyfriend had to run across the street to our local pharmacy because "all the other pharmacies didn't have what he needed." she said. -_-

Now with Skip's mother being sick (got second opinion possibility its not cancer just cysts, test results in 2 weeks) she offered to take the kids for the remainder of Friday, Saturday and sunday. Seeing her track record made me go hmmm. Because Skip was in no condition to have the little ones around. He was very emotional and I work in a place I deal with tempermental/irrational people. I didn't want him to say something to the kids and regret it. Saturday morning after we had spoken to his mother trying to half-heartedly cheer her up, she calls us going I just got out of the hospital because I passed out, come get the kids. (It was a lie) My boyfriend went for reals?! he heard the guy in the background so she tried crying louder so he couldn't hear the guy. He was I cant come get them! Heather has work at 2 and I have work at 10pm! She wont be home until 11 so unless you want to babysit them for an hour then sure I can take them. If you cant then we cant help you. She got hysterical and he was what you want me to leave them alone for an hour?! She made no comment. He got livid and hung up. Yea its sounding like she leaves them alone at home when she has them.

Now school has started again, we live close enough where we can take them to school with no problem BUT in the custody agreement shes supposed to have them between 3:10pm Monday to 7:00 Friday then its us. We had them for 12 days of their 2 week Easter vacation.... But my issue whats going to happen for the summer?! She's getting tax dollars/Welfare and "child support" of $50 from the state, and not have the kids!?
 
Hi there, and welcome back! :LOL:

It's sad when parents think they own their kids and when partners think they can change and control the other person... I'm happy that you guys escaped from their manipulation, and that you found each other. In a relationship, it's important to let the other person have their interests and to be supportive of them, and you seem to be doing exactly that, which is awesome. ^^ It's even better if you can share your interests with each other. It's great that he's watching MLP with you (I've got my boyfriend to do the same, and I think he enjoys it despite the halfhearted protests). D&D and VtM are fantastic, so perhaps you should go with him one day and just observe, even if it's just to see what it's about.


I agree, and welcome back to MLPTP. This is a good place to meet good friends and have supportive advice.

Glad to have you home again here at the TP!:winkpony:
 
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